Getting Your Ex Back With A Deep Apology
Most of us never really learned much about how to apologize. We all know how to say “I’m sorry” of course. But beyond that, we don’t know what to do or say to seek forgiveness. When you wronged your mate and want to get your ex back, just saying I’m sorry won’t cut it.
There is a free course you can download instantly on this at Making Up With Your Ex Fast.
There are much more impactful ways of apologizing, however. When you’ve been dumped by your ex for wronging them in some way, you will need to use what can be called a Power Apology.
A power apology has as many as 7 or eight steps to it. A power apology is designed to get your ex from anger or hurt to acceptance and forgiveness in just hours or sometimes even minutes. Power apologies should be taught in school, they are so useful in keeping relationships from ending. Here are the steps to a Power Apology:
The first thing is to fess up to what you did. Own up to it. Admit it if you wronged your mate (there is a different process if your mate wronged you). This is important because rather than excuses and explanations I was drunk, it didn’t mean anything! you let your ex know that you understand that you did them wrong.
The second step is to mirror their feelings. This is powerful relationship intelligence. How do you mirror their feelings? You say something like I know what I did hurt you, and made you feel betrayed, and sad. You tell your ex how what you did made them feel. Mirroring their emotional state is potent emotional intelligence. Your ex will start to feel really heard.
The third step is to let them vent. Now you let them tell you how they feel about what you did wrong. You don’t argue, you dont defend yourself, you let them get their angry and hurt feelings off their chest. Your only job here is to make them feel heard and understood.
To understand more about the power of venting, you can check out the information at a site on Relationship Intelligence.
If you have followed these first three steps, you are well on your way to making an apology that will get accepted and lead to forgiveness. By this point you have not tried to blame or defend yourself to your ex for what you did wrong. You have been an adult and taken responsibility. At some level they will respect this. Then you have surprised them by mirroring their feelings, so they are feeling like you understand them. And finally, you have listened to them, let them vent and get things off their chest.
Finally you can now actually say I’m sorry and apologize. Now it will likely get accepted by your ex.
Part 2 of this article discusses the steps to take after you’ve apologized, and it can be seen here at Get Ex Back Part 2.
