Relationship Advice On Male Intimacy
The way that men and women relate to relationship is different. This is not groundbreaking news. However, when it comes to relationship problems, it is useful to understand how each sex relates to relationship. You can get info on intimacy help here.
Men don’t generally practice intimacy in the same way as women. They don’t get much practice growing up at nurturing, empathizing, and being other focused. It was not in their enculteration as children.
Yes, men know how to communicate in relationship, but the way in which we communicate is often different than females, it is usually oriented towards problem-solving (a form of winning), and establishing dominance (or avoiding it from others).
So men, speaking in large generalities here, know a lot about winning and losing, boundaries and control. They may not know much about empathy and the value of nurturing others and focusing on the needs of others.
How did this happen? When growing up, boys played cowboys and Indians, they played army, they played tackle football. These are games of dominance and control. There is nothing at all wrong with these games, it is important for boys to play and learn about dominance and boundaries as they grow. You can get more How To Get Marriage Guidance Help here.
Girls played with dolls. They played house. They had imaginary tea parties. These are games of nurturing and socializing. Girls actually learn and play at intimacy growing up. This is a powerful difference. So given the different ways genders are socialized, when it comes to building intimacy, who has the most innate skill?
Would it be women, who learned from childhood how to love and nurture and socialize? Or would it be men, who learned how to scream “I shot you, you’re dead!”
Here’s the thing to take away from all this. If you are a woman, dont just assume that men know what to do or how to get and stay close. Don’t just get frustrated and want to give up. Give them some guidance. If you are a man, understand that it is useful at times to let women lead, to learn from them about how to connect and nurture and build intimacy. You can learn more about Making Up In Love here.
